Day 2 conversations with Darcy

Darcy: you okay?

me: mostly tired, but okay. not sleeping through the night

Darcy: well get used to that! ha ha. Im kidding...just trying to make light of it.

when is your mom leaving?

me: next wednesday

had a visit with my doctor this morning & am confirmed

preggo

Darcy: why are you confused?they confirmed...

confused about if you should keep it?

me: no... not at all

have to think about how I want it delivered & where

if i should have the quad 4 test

Darcy: you have a long time for that

me: what i would do if the results said the bean had a problem

Darcy: that one is a BIG decision, but you have awhile before that..and its rare that it would come back with a problem

want my thoughts when I had the tests?

me: yes

Sent at 11:54 AM on Monday

Darcy: everyone is different...but the first time I was in Europe for the first trimester, so I missed the quad 4 tests, etc...had to just get the amniocentisis

I thought for sure I would terminate it if it had Downs

thankfully she didn't so I never had to make that decision

Sent at 11:55 AM on Monday

Darcy: now on the second one, I took the blood tests, etc..and they've come back fine so far. If they hadn't I dont think I could have terminated.

SO..my point...you really shouldn't worry and stress about it at all right now..because until you are FACED with it and HAVE to make a decision, you wont know what you'd do. So relax and assume nothing is wrong until something is

me: good advice

Poor Dean is really freaked out too

Darcy: dont be. seriously its rare.

worry just makes for an unhealthy mom and baby

give it a little more time, wait until your mom is gone, things settle and you're more used to the idea, and it'll seem better

are you sick at all?

how many weeks along are you?

me: I'm 5 weeks along now

mom & my aunt rosa are here until next wednesday

IF the tulips are up, we'll head up to Mt. Vernon for the festival

IF it's a nice day, we'll take a ferry to Bainbridge

she & my aunt are being adventurous while I'm at work (helps that the TV is on the fritz!)

they may even take a bus down to Pike Place Market on their own...

last night they were out until 9:30 & I scolded her for not calling

Darcy: ha ha. Let them have fun!you sick at all yet?

me: not sick... I usually have a double dose of nausea and exhaustion in the afternoon

topped off with sore boobs

the medical technician that drew my blood this morning just had a baby 3 months ago & she said she didn't start to get sick until week 8

something to look forward too!

i'm actually excited

keeping it a secret is going to be tough... but we've already got a cover story for why I'm not drinking, so it should be fine

Darcy: for the sickness?

the exhaustion is the worst. But I have never had morning sickness with either pregnancy (or even the one I lost)

me: i'm keeping my fingers crossed...

the other thing the doctor told me to think about is how I want it delivered...

i don't even know where to start...

Darcy: what do you mean "How"? they are giving you an option? What are your options?

you mean natural, or with drugs?

me: midwife

then he mentioned other types of doctor-types

i wasn't able to compute

Darcy: oh, screw that. Go for the full medical way speaking from DISASTER experience..you need to be IN the hospital in case something goes wrong, the baby has very little time

and with FULL medical everything

AND DRUGS!

SERIOUS DRUGS

me: that's kinda freaking me out too.i've seen pictures

Darcy: sorry. But I almost lost Ansley, as well as almost dying myself..if I'd have not been there already, one of us or both would not be here

me: at home is not an option

Darcy: plus you have NO idea what kind of a mess you'd have to clean up!

me: i thought the smaller hospital near my home would be good

(I've heard of the mess... NOT interested)

Darcy: whichever one your doctor feels is better. or whichever one has nicer rooms. give it a tour.

me: did you & chuck talk about this or did he mostly let you just decide

Darcy: they do that

me: tours.. yes

Darcy: I didnt have a choice...my doctor delivers at Northside by our house. its the biggest baby hospital on the east coast

do a little research on the NICU, just in case. Go to whichever hospital can keep your baby alive if necessary

me: I'll take a tour of the two top ones.

my doctor also gave me a list of doctors that he could hook me up

with (he doesn't deliver anymore)

Darcy: lo=)O?/;;kl;'-

sorry, that was ansley

me: haha

Darcy: well then wait and find your OB, and THEN think about this stuff

they'll have completely different opinions

me: question about men...

Darcy: they suck

me: haha

Darcy: but go ahead

me: true

dean is freaked out. i want him to be involved, but he's just completely freaked out

he leaves tomorrow

Darcy: give him some time he'll come around

me: should I wait to do the hospital tours when he gets back?

how much decision making should I push on him now?

Darcy: yes

wait for the hospital tours until at LEAST the second trimester

seriously

me: ok

Darcy: you still have a big risk of miscarriage until 12 weeks. Sorry

its just reality

me: he covered that this morning too

Darcy: its not all that rare

after I had one, I found out A LOT of my friends had had them too.

me: I know a lot of moms who've lost babies early too

i'm trying not to get too excited, but it's hard! i'm ready to go!

Darcy: its okay to get excited.you cant help it

me: i was thinking about practical things like... decorating the 2nd bedroom for a nursery

& selling the convertible in order to get a more mom-friendly car

Darcy: hold off and wait until 13 weeks

me: maybe a saab wagon

Darcy: you have time for all of that...you have 9 more months

you have NO idea yet how expensive kids are..you might want to get a honda

and I aint a kiddin

me: We're due around Thanksgiving

Darcy: Formula is like $25 a can

me: i told dean we should have the family in town for Christmas...

he said "WHOA! We have time for that"

i said "oh... I know, but it's something to think about"

Darcy: he's right, simmer down

me: i'm changing my 401k so that I get more cash each week

i need something to do

otherwise, i get all crazy excited

Did you know...

Darcy: oh lord...here we go! kidding, I'm glad you're excited

me: his father's first name was Kenneth & my mom called my father Kenny

Darcy: well then, I guess we have a name

me: if we have a boy... seems destined to have Kenneth as one of his names

I AM THRILLED!!! crazy I know

Darcy: you'll find naming a child is the hardest part. its excrutiating!

me: I've had a boy named picked out since I was 15

i don't have a girl name picked out

Darcy: But Darcy is a nice name

me: :)

maybe it will be better for Dean to go away & think aboutit

Darcy: yes, it will help him

and you cant make him feel a certain way. he'll do it on his own

me: one thing is certain.i do not want to be at work

Darcy: nor will you want to be from now on

me: not that much of a change from where i was last week, actually

Darcy: ha ha

me: if you can't drink coffee, how do you stay awake when you're bored?

Darcy: You have a really hard time! I actually drink half calf

me: nice